This Britney Shiz is Unbelievable

I guess this is what happens when girls are encouraged to lie about who they are and to perpetuate the myth of today's bankrupt femininity. The essence of women getting their value from external sources (men, from daddy to hubby) and from how they behave (sexy, for example) is the very opposite of self-esteem (understanding your human value with out having to justify it). Go to TMZ and look at Brit's blank face. Poor crazy rich girl.

Juno: "honest to blog", it's lamer than you think it is even if you think you liked it.

Sometimes, a little slice of pop culture like Juno comes along and seems to set the world on fire. Is the world really on fire? Is Juno really enjoyable, or do you just spend most of the time watching the movie preparing to laugh. It's almost like the marketing campaign and the intrigue of another off-the-mark indie-hipster cliche flick convinced people that they should be "getting it" and laughing even though you'd have to be retarded to laugh during this movie. It reminds me of a lame band that I hate called the Moldy Peaches.

Has anyone been sooo over it before?
My boyfriend dragged me to watch them at the Manuel Artime theater in Miami, and as I sat there watching the most annoying people I'd ever seen in my life dance around like they were putting on a skit for grandma, what really puzzled me was why the audience seemed to like it so much. Come to think of it, at the end of Juno the two characters sing a Moldy Peaches song to each other as they strum acoustic guitars. I don't know what's worse, but the audience seemed to like that too. Am I taking crazy pills? Not today anyway.

Also, it's a pretty ridiculous, movie-ruining notion that the Juno character - cute, smart, whatever Ellen Page is most likely - would really fall in love with the Paulie Bleeker (father of the her baby) character -- a character that seems like something Wes Anderson might have farted onto a page in high school - when he's ignored her needs and issues for 9 months. Ellen Page: yay. Diablo Cody: naybe (Is that as clever as "Honest to Blog?"). Michael Cera: nay.

Back in the SoFla - So so so far

Photo By: Troy M.

I'm home in Fort Lauderdale for Christmas. It's been a-ok so far. Went out to the wine bar with my mom and her boyfriend last night. Ooooh, Humphrey Bogart is up on
the TV screen at Brew Urban loft cafe. Yummy. Why was Bogie so hot? He was 5'8" and weird looking, but SO hot. Strange. Anyway, last night at the wine bar - Kala's wine bar - in that shopping center on A1A and Oakland I got wasted on some glasses of red and got chatty with the fun crowd there. A nice, loud woman named Erica told my mom how sexy she was and grilled me about my qualifications for writing her life story, which got increasingly amusing as the wine compromised my ability to put 2 and 2 together. Then, we went to my mom's boyfriend's place, where we drank more wine and I proceeded to tell him "how I really feel", which is my new way of saying, "TMI". When you talk someone's head off against your better judgment and his and her will, it's called "telling them how you really feel."

Working today -- doing stuff for my new job at Mahalo, the human powered search engine. I'm having a really good time writing How Tos for that company -- I think this website will be a smash -- actually useful search engine results. Novel. Mahalo also has a social network for contributing your own best ideas for links and search results. You can create a Mahalo profile up by clicking on Create Account on the upper right hand corner of that page. Here's my page, if you want to check it out: http://www.mahalo.com/member/Courtney


Hecks to the yeahs, people. Sweet Bronco will be back on SoFla landscape in a matter of hours. Very exciting. We might try to book him at a local venue over the next few days. We'll see. Working on it. Working it out. I'm streaming consciousness right now and it feels good -- really, really good -- but I think I'm going to stop anyway so that I'm not sending too much uncensored me-ness (thanks Dupree) out into the universe.

Audrina gets shunted from Hyde

Too funny! Ink Pen has devoted a bit of this blog space to making fun of Audrina Partridge in the past. She's the Hills girl who wasn't on Laguna Beach but, lucky for her, she "randomly" met LC and Heidi Montag by the pool at the corporate apartment complex they stayed at when they first moved up to LA from Laguna. After they "met" on lounge chairs, Audrina became an integral part of the drama fest. Her vacant stare is avoided by real celebrities at many a hip Hollywood party, but not on a recent night at Hyde. Yes, Audrina got some Tara Reid, D-list rejected from Hyde action the other night. Yes, it's very funny, and when Audrina's the butt of the joke, you don't have to feel bad for laughing.

Audrina gets shunted from Hyde

Why Boring People?

Are boring people boring because they lack internal resources? Or is it willfulness? I've always been puzzled. Any thoughts?

The Tool Shed Is Missing Its

Dane Cook demonstrates the universal "tool" symbol:



What does that even mean, people?
The roomie BIFF says that she heard that he worked really hard when he came to Hollywood, working the midnight shift and alls that shizz -- yes I'm being sarcastic thought it doesn't read and might not appear funny.

Pee Shy?

If you're pee shy because you can't pee because people might think that you're pooping, you should try utilizing the Insite advertising for more than it's intended purpose (using your most vulnerable moment to make you feel like you should buy things you don't need or want). Read aloud the message on the advertIZment to yourself, but only read the vowels in the soft vowel sound. Ex: elephant would read: "eh" "eh" "ah". You will pee with no worries ever.