10 Movies Not To Watch Ever

YOU DON'T GOTTA WATCH...

I've always thought that my strong impulse to not watch Boys Don't Cry was a sign of weakness, a sign of things to overcome. Some movies deal with issues so serious that it seems like the decision whether or not to watch them is a reflection on your moral fiber. Can you look at the dramatization of this serious issue (gang rape, homophobic murder, holocaust, female oppression, racist murder, suicide, hideous serial killer depressed in skating rink set to Journey song) dead in the eye? Or, are you a soma-eating weakling who can't deal with the really real in reality?

A recent conversation with my bestie -- who I can honestly say is the person who gets more living done in 24 hours than anyone else I've ever known -- made me reconsider my moralizing stance on "important" movies that are traumatizing to watch.

She started off by saying, "I made the mistake of seeing Born on the Fourth of July. Why am I watching this parapalegic? " She added, "Capturing the Friedmans is another classic. These are movies not to watch on a Friday night, movies not to watch on a date night, movies not to watch ever."

10 Movies Not To Watch Ever:

1) Boys Don't "Should I Be Watching This?" Cry
2) Shindler's "I'm going to shoot myself in the face" List
3) The "I wish I'd never been born" Accused
4) North "I Hate Men" Country
5) Mississippi "I would never want to watch" Burning
6) Monster - there are too many reasons to not watch this move
7) Monster's "Never saw it. Of course. Why would I?" Ball
8) Leaving "Why would I watch that fucking shit?" Las Vegas
9) Saving "Please Sign Me Up" Private Ryan
10)United "I will never see the Eifel Tower" 93

"Who would buy these movies?" she asked, then added, "Those movies should only be played for 24 hours and then never again."

Other contenders for movies to not watch: Happiness, Sweet Hereafter.